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So that's me on the horse on the far left. "Wild Thing" was his name. That picture has nothing to do with what I'm about to write, I just find entries with pictures to be more aesthetic.
Anyway, I have just returned to Florence for the remainder of my wonderful month long Christmas break. I haven't written an update in quite a while, I guess because I haven't been able to really get my thoughts together amongst all that has been going on in my life. Life for me, however, has been completely wonderful. I am truly happy and I know that because I am finally able to look back on the bad times in my life and be thankful for them because of where they have brought me. I realize that I would not be the person I am today without all of the lessons learned from my bad experiences. The way I look at relationships specifically, and the way a look at life in general has been shaped by all that I have been through and I find those lessons to be most valuable.
When I look at my life I see how faithful God has been through it all. He has brought good from every negative situation I have encountered. Where would I be without Him? I am so thankful for what he has allowed me to experience (good and bad) because it has made me who I am. It has made me so thankful for the good times and the people in my life who are truly good. Because of hard times I appreciate my family more, I realize what completely amazing friends I am blessed with, and I know a good relationship when I am in one. I have learned what is important in life and that I need to be more patient. I have learned that I need show love to everyone and not pass judgment. I have learned to take notice of all the small and beautiful things in the world, like sunsets or smiles or anything that has good in it. I am probably starting to sound a little cheesy here, but I'm just so thankful for where I am. I am excited about my life to come and I cannot fathom what I will learn and how much God is going to teach me.
My grandmother almost died yesterday. I woke up at 7:00 am to my phone going off and when I saw that it was my mother calling I instantly knew that it was not good news. No one in my family calls me before 8:00 unless something bad has happened.
Mom told me my grandmother was in a coma and they didn't know how long she would live. They thought she'd had a "catastophic stroke" and were surprised that she even made it through the night. When I got off the phone with my mother my immediate reaction was sadness at the fact that I would probably never get to speak to Mamaw again. Then I thought how much I took our relationship for granted. I didn't visit her the last time I was home because I was too busy, I didn't call her enough just to say hello or just to check on her, I didn't even know she was taking medicine for high blood pressure or that she even had high blood pressure!! I'm in pharmacy school for crying out loud! I should at least know what medications my grandparents are on and make sure they are taking them correctly and that they are ok. What kind of a grandaughter was I? I was most upset that I didn't tell her enough how much I loved her and how happy I was that she was my grandmother. I wasn't ready for her to go. She wasn't supposed to go yet.
So all day I waited for news, waited to see when I should go home. I prayed too. I prayed that God would make her better but only if she could be her old self again and be happy. Then, at five I got a call from mom. Mamaw was fine. Perfectly normal. Infact, she hadn't even had a stroke! (It was something else that I won't explain for the sake of making this extremely long but if you are interested just ask.) Mamaw was sitting up and talking and wondering why everyone was there. She was her old self. Thank God!
So, now I get another chance. I get to be the grandaughter I realized I wasn't. I get to talk to my grandmother again.
Yesterday I realized what is most important in life. People. People that you love and care about. People who love you. I get so busy and wrapped up in my daily life that I forget to make a simple phone call or sit down and write a card. Those things are easily overlooked but they are so important. The sad thing is that you may not realize it until it is too late. It was almost too late for me. Praise God for second chances!
Leslie told me about this awesome thing on Google called Picasa. If you haven't heard of it, I strongly suggest that you check it out. You can do all kinds of really cool stuff with your pictures and it's completely free! So, shout out to Picasa.
In other news, this semester is flying by. I mean flying!! I have four classes left and then I'm off to Birmingham. I can't even comprehend this. I get sad thinking of leaving Auburn but I get excited thinking about my new life in Birmingham.
Over all, I'm just loving life right now and enjoying all that is going on. I have been busy with different things but I am seeing ways that God is using me and I love that! God is teaching me patience, no doubt. I can see it all the time in random situations when I get so frustrated and then I pause to realize what I'm supposed to be learning. Be patient. I used to think that I was a patient person but I've realized that I need some serious work in that area. I've always been told not to pray for patience so I don't, but I guess God sees a need and He goes for it giving me all the discipline I can handle.
I went into Hastings today with some friends to just to kill time before my class today. I love the way that a bookstore can inspire me so much! Every time I am in a bookstore I realize just how much I don't know and how much I want to learn. Today I was looking at books on history. I realized that I don't remember much about history but I think that it's really cool because it shapes who we are today. This made me want to learn more about history...later. I have also recently been inspired to take more pictures and actually use the pictures that I take. I love photography but rarely make time for it (hence the picasa shout out). The fall is an awesome time for nature pictures because the leaves are all so beautiful and I'm planning to take a trip out to the park sometime soon to see if I can get some pretty shots. I'll put some up if I get any.
And last, I have been taking a ballroom dancing class every Monday night that I LOVE! One of the elders at our church is teaching it and he is such a good teacher. So far I have learned East Coast Swing, the Fox Trot, the Waltz, the Cha Cha, the Rumba, and the Mambo. Tonight I had to miss the Tango lessons and I'm very sad about that. However, it has been so much fun and given me something else to look forward to each week. Plus, my dance partners are really good so that makes it even better!
Well, I could write tons more but I guess I'll wrap it up and get some sleep for my early class tomorrow. I don't do early very well......
I never get sick. Or I guess I should say I rarely ever get sick. Once a year at most. Well, I caught a cold out of nowhere and I really forgot how bad they suck. They just make you feel like sitting there and doing nothing, which is fine for a day or so, but 3 days is getting a little excessive. On top of that my little CR-V gave out on me Monday night and I still don't know what's wrong with her. I never realized how much I depend on her to take me places until now. Even simple tasks like going to Wal-Mart and class are now more of a challenge. Making plans for this weekend has been an enormous task for me because of this sickness, the car breaking down, and the fact that I'm going home the next weekend for the Ole Miss game. I really am frustrated that everything is so up in the air and on top of all that I can't play soccer!!!
I sound like a whiney baby don't I? In the grand scheme of things I've absolutely got it made. I've got everything I could ever ask for, even with a broken down car. For my Bible study this week we talked about the heart. We were supposed to make a list of things that we loved in random order and so I sat down and started typing away. There are so many blessings that I have and so many things in my life to love! I could go on forever typing the things that I love.
Also, something really really good happened to me this week. In case you aren't aware, I have a mild to moderate hearing loss that prevents me from hearing things like, you know, people's voices. Well, I got a call this week from the Vocational Rehab center and they told me that because my hearing loss interferes with me being able to get my degree (in that I can't hear) then they will help me pay some of my tuition!! What a blessing! They can't help pay for any of the school I've already completed, but they will help me pay for the rest of it. I just can't believe it! God is definitely blessing me with this.
Well, I'm tired now and should probably get some sleep. I hope that whoever reads this is doing well and is happy. I suggest making a list of things that you love. You can list anything and everything from people to animals to places to activities to smells to feelings to whatever else.
Life is sort of like a book that you read. As you go on you find out more and more about the story and the characters and you get a better understanding of what's happening. I guess that's common sense though because everyone's life is a story in itself.
I just finished reading a post by a girl I used to babysit who just recently turned sixteen. She was talking about things that she's finally realized about herself and about life. As we grow older some of us realize exactly what is important and what is trivial, what we should spend our time on and what is a waste, what will last and what is temporary.
I feel that I have done a pretty good job at realizing these life truths as I've grown up, but there are some things I fear that I will never fully grasp. People, for example, will never be easy for me to understand. I have learned that I am not a very good judge of character and a few times that has come back to kick me in the butt. In my nievity I try to give people the benefit of the doubt and always take them at their word. However, people lie. Lots and lots of people lie. Who knew?
Maybe when I grow up a little more I'll have the ability to discern who is real and who isn't. Unfortunately, I think it's something you are born with and I just don't have it.
In other news, I'm thinking of being on the next season of The Bachelor.
Men possess many qualities that I admire and respect. I believe that men and women were made to balance each other out which is quite a beautiful thing. The relationship between a man and a woman was supposed to work, it was supposed to flow. It was supposed to be perfect. Unfortunately, something happened along the way and now there's a curse involved.
"To the woman he said, 'I will greatly increase your pains in childbearing; with pain you will give birth to children. Your desire will be for your husband and he will rule over you." ~Genesis 3:16
Basically, when Adam and Eve screwed up, this whole perfect relationship between man and woman went down the drain making everything a lot more complicated.
Fabulous!
Today I have seen two different friends competely upset by the way a man has treated them. It just made me so mad to see these wonderful girls being treated the way that they were because I know that they deserve so much better!
I was thinking about these girls' situations on my way home tonight and I got really frustrated. I have heard of so many crazy stories lately about men; selfish, lying, cheating men and it makes me sick! How is it that so many girls fall victim to these men who are such smooth talkers and who are so seemingly wonderful yet competely rotten to the core? I don't understand it!!
I can say one thing for sure. When I find that man, the one that God has out there for me, the one who is pure in heart, the one that I can respect, the one that is honest, selfless and loving, I will say, "at last!" This is not to say that I don't know any men like that already. I know lots of wonderful guys that I respect very much. I will just be so happy when I know that I have found the right one for me. I will be so happy to know that I am taken care of. I know that no man is perfect, but a man who seeks God with his whole heart is as perfect as they come. For when he fails, God is there to back him up.
To the Beluga Whale. The cutest/weirdest looking thing ever! When I was little I used to imagine myself as part of the Killer Whale show at Sea World. Whenever I got to visit Sea World I always wanted to be the one lucky kid who got chosen to be part of the show. I never got picked so I just daydreamed about what it would be like. They always seemed to pick the stupid kids that were scared of the whales and didn't know what to do. In my daydreams ( I was a very vivid daydreamer as a child and still am. This all stems from the fact that I had a hearing loss and when I couldn't hear what was being said I'd just make things up in my head to think about.) I would ride along holding onto Shamoo's fin. Then I would get out of the tank and feed him fish. It would have been awesome. That story has nothing to do with Beluga whales, but I really want to up the recognition and appreciation of the general population for the Beluga whale. Why? Pretty much because I saw a picture of one and really liked it. Beluga whales are like Manatees, you just have to love them because they're so darn cute!
So my creative energy has been all spent out at school and I haven't had much time to write lately. Here's a little update on me...
1. Hanging out with the roomies... in the picture. I have been blessed to have such wonderful roommates over the years and me, Shelley, and Leslie are having a lot of fun together this year. We spent all of this week with no AC and it just got fixed today!! Yes! Cool air once again!
2. Friends. Being back at Auburn I have been reunited with lots of my friends and it's been great getting to see them and just hang out with them and have fun.
3. Auburn Football! Ok, some people are in love with Auburn football. Not this girl. I mean, I like it and all that, but it's just so stressful for me. Sometimes I get too anxious to actually enjoy the games. I mean, the crowds, the parking, the getting in the gate three hours before the game starts, making sure you are sitting with all your friends...... all that is just not my idea of a relaxing weekend. It's something you gotta experience though so I'm enjoying it. After all, this is my last football season in Auburn!
4. The park. I have this little place in Auburn that I love to visit. I like to go out there and spread my blanket out and read, enjoy the beauty of the surroundings, and just think about life. (Yeah, I get made fun of for "thinking about life" but hey, it's what I do.) Since I have more free time in my schedule I've gotten to visit this little park more often and spend some time running out there with my trusty running buddy.
5. The gym. Me and the roomies, my sis, and Alli have made a few visits together out to the gym for some Body Pump, yoga, and RPM action. Let me just say that RPM kicks my butt. I mean, it is hard! The yoga experience is quite hilarious if you stop and look around at everyone in the room standing in these weird poses, but it's relaxing. Joining a gym was money well spent and I highly recommend it.
6. God. Like I said before, one of the great things about God is that you can never learn enough or be filled enough and you always have room to grow. I have gotten to go back to Encounter which is always a blessing. I am also about to join a Bible Study with some people at school on the book "Waking the Dead." I'm really looking forward to getting to know these people better and spending time with them learning about God. I think it is so cool the way that you can learn things from other Christians and be encouraged by them and the way God is working in their life. The other day I was reading a girl's facebook profile and I was just really encouraged by a verse she had written under her quotes. I think it so cool the way God can use us to touch others in ways that we may not even know!
7. School. I love school!!! Ok, I don't love school, but it is soooo much better this year. I have much more free time and I am actually learning things that will help me in my career. The fact that I get to have somewhat of a life this semester thrills me!
I'm in that age range where you have to make a lot of important life decisions. It's exciting and all, but let's be honest, it kind of sucks. Upon high school graduation you have to make the big decision, "Where do I go to college?" Next on the list of big decisions, "What do I major in?" I've had those two decisions down since day one. Go to Auburn. Major: Pharmacy. Awesome! I'm good to go. Not.
It wasn't long after I came to Auburn that I realized it's not all about me. I realized that I'm supposed to use my life to help others. Hmm, this is a bit of a burden, all of this life responsibility. This realization was surprising, yet exciting to me at the same time. I suddenly felt a true sense of purpose and realized what this whole "life" thing was all about. That was five years ago. Now I'm faced with other realizations and decisions. Now I'm thinking about life after college (I never thought it would come) and all that it entails: a job, a new city, marriage, children, a pay check, insurance, a house payment, buying my own car... I might go crazy! I know that all of those things don't come at once, but the "grown up days" are drawing nearer.
And now back to that lesson I learned five years ago, it's not about me. I am often asking myself, "What am I doing that really matters?" "Who am I helping?" "Where am I going?" "What does God want from me?" I think that finding the answers to these questions is all just part of growing up, but I think it's something I will never stop asking because I will never stop growing.
Growing up is sometimes difficult for me because I don't deal very well with change. I like what's familiar and I like to know the plan. However, life is full of mysteries and I just have to face the unknown with faith in my maker. Here I am now; In school, trying to keep my life balanced between friends, family, school work, God, time for myself, and life's responsibilities. I guess I'm in the midst of this crazy journey we call life. I love it, I'm thankful for it, I just want to make the most of it.
Great picture, huh? This was taken after a nice long kyaking trip around the island of St. John. Those were the days... summer... no work....just fun....
Notice I haven't updated in, oh, 2 weeks. That's because I've been at school, the real world, studying.
Okay, it's not so bad. The first day of class lasted for seven hours and by the end of it I felt right at home. Just like last year, only one year closer to graduation day. Studying takes up most of my time these days but I'm still making it to body pump (which is awesome) and running with my running buddy. My weekends thus far have been spent catching up on things I don't have time to do during the week, like cleaning and etc. All in all I'm loving my life and happy to be where I am now. So, for those of you who keep up with me through this medium, rest assured that I'm doing fine so far and have had no breakdowns yet. Fun things on tomorrow's agenda: laying out, a guitar lesson, a giant slip-n-slide, and maybe a little kinetics... we'll see.
"Trust in God with all of your heart and lean not on your own understanding.; in all of your ways acknowledge him and he will make your paths strait." ~Proverbs 3:5-6
This entry is difficult for me to put into words so brace yourself:
Tonight I was talking to one of my good friends on the phone and we were catching up because I hadn't talked to her in a couple of weeks. She told me about a situation in her life that she wanted to work out a certian way but she was frustrated and tired of waiting on it to happen. I told her to pray about it and with absolute assurance I told her that it would all work out the way it was supposed to. I know that sounds silly because all things eventually work out one way or another, but I could honestly tell her that God would take care of it and I know without a doubt that he will.
Then I started thinking how awesome it is that God takes care of us and that we can rely on him to work things out for the best for us. Faith is something I have always had a lot of, but trust,not so much. I always have faith that God will work things out, but it's the journey from the origin to that certian destination that tends get me. Even when I know that God is taking care of things I always try to take things into my own hands. That's all part of being human I guess and it's something I try to realize about myself.
The whole point of my writing this though is to say that I'm so glad that I don't have to be in control. I'm so glad that I can rely on the One who sees all and knows all, and loves me so much, to take care of every aspect of my life. I love that I can honestly tell my friends, "God will work it out for you" and believe it and know it to be true. That is just so wonderful to me!
Other verses that are great reminders to me are: Jeremiah 29:11 and Phil 4:6-8
Thursday, July 27 I was walking around New York City but I wasn't really thinking about New York. I was anxiously waiting for a phone call from a friend telling me where I would be spending my fourth year of Pharmacy School. I had six locations to choose from that I had to rank in order. Everyone in my class submitted their rankings and it was by a lottery that we got our locations. Birmingham was my first choice but it was also a lot of other people's so I wasn't guarenteed to get it. I was nervous but I knew that God would put me where I needed to be in the end. My message finally came in the late afternoon and I did get Birmingham! I was so happy to finally know where I would be my last year of school. Then I got a little sad. The reality sunk in that this will be my last year at Auburn and my last year of actual college. Everything in my life will be different after this year. I will move to a new city, a new church, make new friends, and go to work every day. (Work for free. Actually I'm paying to work.) I won't get to live in the same town as my sister and I won't get to be at school with my brother. This was all a little upsetting for me to realize. At the same time, I am very excited about starting a new part of my life in Birmingham. Several of my very best friends live there and some of my best friends from school will be moving there too! Also, it's only 2 hours from home and Auburn! I am not one to accept change very easily and it takes me a little while to adjust. I know that God has wonderful things in store for me so I'm not worried. I am going to enjoy my last year at Auburn and make it the very best! I am so excited about all that will happen in the months to come! Two days left in Florence and then it's back to Auburn!
Last night I slept in a bed. A real bed. My own bed. With real sheets. In a room all by myself. When I woke up this morning (around noon) it was just me. It was weird.
Late last Friday night I arrived at Shiloh and snuck into my cabin where all of the little girls (in the picture above) were already sleeping. I met Jill, one of the counselors I
would be sharing a cabin with , and then went to sleep on my mattress on the floor where I would be sleeping for the following five nights. It has been a while since I shared a room and bathroom with ten other girls.
First of all I have to say that the counselors there are amazing and I told them I don't know how they do it. One week wore me out and they are there for about six! Despite the crowdedness of our cabin and the grossness of our bathroom and the fact that we couldn't flush the toilet paper, I had a wonderful experience at camp. I know that I was meant to be on that trip.
My purpose for being at that camp was to spend time with the kids and to help them see God's love. However, while I was there God also showed me things about himself. Being with those children showed me how very blessed I am. I knew that I was blessed, but it wasn't until being there that I understood what kind of life I have. I live without fear of someone hurting me in my neighborhood, I live with a family who loves me, I have a promising future and parents that will always take care of me, and I have everything that I could ever want. I've got it made and half the time I don't even realize it. It is so foolish of me to ever complain.
Being on the trip made me think a lot about love. Not romantic love, but God's love for us and the love that we are supposed to have for others. When I was going to sleep one night I noticed a Bible verse that was written on the wall above me. It said, "Live in such a way that you shine like stars in the universe." It was taken from Philippians 2:15. It got my attention so I opened my Bible and read Philippians 2. This passage stuck out to me.
"Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit, but in humility consider others better than yourselves. Each of you should look not only to your own interests, but also the interests of others. Your attitude should be the same as that of Christ Jesus: Who, being in very nature God, did not consider equality with God something to be grasped, but made himself nothing taking the very nature of a servant, being made in human likeness. And being found in appearance as a man, he humbled himself and became obedient to death - even death on a cross!" ~Philippians 2: 4-8
Then I thought about myself sleeping on the floor, sharing a room and bathroom with ten girls and spending my days focusing all of my attention on them. That was difficult for me because I am used to my clean, comfortable home and bed and privacy and doing whatever I want. Then, in a very very small way I was able to understand a little better just what Jesus did for me. He left Heaven. He left the greatest place in existence to come to this nasty, sinfull, disease filled world to be hated and laughed at and killed. He was God but he was considered to be nothing. He came here for years and focused his attention on us and did everything for us. He died for us. He loved us that much.
I was trying so hard not to cry. I kept telling myself not to but as I sat there watching the movie I couldn't help myself. The tears finally came and they just kept coming and coming! Tonight was Mike's (my youth minister from my home church) last night at our church before he and his family move to Austrailia indefinitely. (Going back in time about an hour). The youth and college classes were combined tonight because it was Mike's last class and Mike put me in charge of helping with the slides during the class. All I had to do was click the little arrow when it was time for the next verse of the song we were singing. This should be easy right? Well, I kind of had a hard time with it. I kept missing my cue and throwing off the praise team and the fifty other people in the room. Not only that, during one of the songs I started to close my eyes (b/c I do that sometimes when I sing) but realized just in time,"I can't do that, I have to see the slides because I have to change them." I am in Pharmacy school but I can't work a slide show.... good grief. Anyway, at the end of class Mike played The Video. It was a video of pictures from the youth group and him with some music playing in the background. It wasn't the pictures that got me because I'm not in the youth group anymore. It was the music. The lyrics of the first song played said something like, "I hope that you love Jesus more when we go our seperate ways." The more I thought about it, the more I realized that I did love Jesus more because of Mike and what a huge part he played in my spiritual growth. Not only has he helped me, but my brother and sister as well. He is the one who baptized Matt! (see picture above and the entry from July 05) Mike took an active role in helping me develop spiritually and I know I would not be the same person without his influence. The second song on the video was a song by Mark Schultz called "Remember Me" that I love and listen to often. That song started playing and I started crying. Then I kept crying. I tried to pull myself together before I had to go say goodbye to the rest of the family (Rebecca and the boys). This took me a good twenty minutes and then I made my way to the building where everyone was gathered to say their goodbyes. Through tears I said goodbye to Rebecca and managed to find the three boys and give them all a hug (I don't think they liked that very much.) Then I had to get out of there fast. As much as I hated to say goodbye to them, I know what awesome things God has planned for them to help Him out with in Austrailia, so it was bittersweet. Something I took away from tonight; I do hope that I help people love Jesus more. I have never thought of it that way, but I do hope that people are better off for having known me. Not because I am so great and wonderful, but because of what God does in me. That's all that matters in life isn't it? Isn't that our purpose? To show God to others so that they might know Him also? To help each other and encourage each other? I am thankful for Mike and for the other people in my life (many who read this blog) who have taken an initiative to help me in my spiritual walk. Without them I know that I would not be the same.
This is Camp Shiloh. On Friday morning I will be leaving Florence and heading to New York to the Catskills Mountains, to Shiloh. I am so excited but a little bit nervous at the same time. I have been so frantically trying to get my quizzes done for school that I haven't had much time to realize how close this trip is! Now that it is only two days away I better start getting ready for it. Not that I haven't done anything to prepare, I made out the itenerary for the trip and prepared the finance sheet for our time in the city. Of course, I have been praying as well, for our group and for the kids we will be in contact with. Shiloh is a camp for the inner city children from the Bronx. They are bussed into the camp and our job is to have fun with them and give them lots of attention. They eat it up too! They hang all over you and want to braid your hair and tell you all kinds of stories and then they cry when you have to leave. Of course, we cry too. Those children are precious and in the time they spend at this camp they experience so many wonderful things that they never get to otherwise. Not just fun activities and camping, they get to experience God and God's love. It is so awesome to me that we get to be the ones to show God's love to these kids. Of course, we get to show God's love every day but in this case they may not ever see it otherwise. When I went to Shiloh in 2001 the theme was "More Than Conquerors."
It came from the verse in Romans that says "In all things we are more than conquerors through Him who loved us." -8:37 It's true you know, especially for those children. I look forward to updating about this when I get back next Sunday! Please keep us in your prayers!
Ross claims to be able to utilize both dance pads at one time. Ross says he can dance on the hardest level. Ross says he will beat me during our Dance Dance Revolution Dance Off we've been planning for about a year now. Ross talks a big game. The above picture is of Ross and his mom doing DDR. Notice Ross' cool anklet and their matching shirts. Yeah, he needs all the help he can get. So he and his mom have matching team shirts.... well I've got skillz. That's all I need.
This summer is passing entirely too quickly! Just three more weeks (one that will be spent in New York) and it's back to school for Katie. I'm trying to cram as much in as possible and still get some work done on those quizzes. (My pharmacy friends will appreciate this: So I've been studying Staph and Strep and last night I had a dream that the doctor told me I had "beta block complement" because I have been sleeping too much. Then he put me on Meclizine. 175 tablets. Four tablets 3 times a day. Ridiculous. I'm not ready for ID 1!!) Anyway, the above picture is of me and two of my adorable cousins on the Fourth of July. One thing I was hoping to do this summer is spend more time with them and I hope that I'll get to do that before I go back to Auburn. Also, I never really got around to learning Spanish. I mean, I tried. I looked into it and realized I couldn't afford the cd set I want so that's gonna have to be a Christmas present. Goal postponed. I'm getting a little stressed thinking about everything I need to do in the next three weeks, people I want to spend time with, things I want to help my mom out with, things I want to get ready for school.....
It's just so easy to get carried away with life and all the things that there are to accomplish and enjoy. I think you just have to pick the things that are most important to you and go from there. I have to submit my regions for where I want to do my rotations next year. It is crazy to me that for the first time in my life I have no idea where I will be in a year!! No idea!!! But I love that it is in God's hands. Who better to plan it?
This was written about me and I wanted to share it.
She's the sun set shadows
She's like Rembrandt's light
She's the history that's played at night
She's my lost compantion
She's my dreaming tree
Together in this brief eternity
Summer days, winter snows
She's all things to behold
She's my kind of rain
Like love from a drunken sky
Confetti falling down all night
She's my kind of rain
Oh, wait... ok. Um, so maybe that's a song by Tim McGraw. But you could imagine what it would be like if it was written about me.
So, here I am in Mobile just hanging out waiting on Allison to get off work so we can hang out.
I'm not just hanging out really, I am reading up on Staph so I can take that goofy quiz and get it out of the way. Anyway, two things have occurred to me as I sit in this coffee shop in Mobile...
Conversation is great. There are a few people sitting to my right that are just chatting and exchanging stories, laughing about their experiences. I love that! Each person is so unique and has so much that they can share. A lot can be gained from just hanging out on a porch or in a coffee shop or restaurant talking with friends or strangers. In fact, some of my best memories come from times my friends and I have been sitting around talking with each other. Another thing, and I may have mentioned this before, I've decided that when I meet new people that I know I will never see again in my lifetime, I will see what all knowledge can be attained by meeting them. I am bound to learn something (or maybe share something valuable with them) and then I (or they) will have something to take away from the encounter instead of it being a complete waste of meeting a person.
This brings me to my next point. I HATE it and I mean HATE it when coffee is called joe. I hate it! Why? Why, why why????? I try not to think about this when I go to Joe Mugs. I think of Joe Mug as a person, not coffee. Coffee called joe reminds me of mud water in a tin cup. Completely unappetizing.
I fully believe with all my heart that there is someone out there for everyone. If you don't believe me then just go to your local Super Wal-Mart, you will see. The following is a true story that occurred in my county several years ago.
My mom is over special education so she has to hold meetings with parents to discuss their child's test scores, academic goals, and etc. This particular meeting my mom had to tell a couple that their daughter's test scores showed that she was mentally retarded. The father came into the meeting wearing a denim vest and a black leather hat, and he had lice in his beard. He wouldn't sit down for the whole meeting because he was mad at my mom for saying that his child was mentally retarded. The mother, upon hearing the news, slammed her hands on the table and said, "She aint those words you say she is! She aint mentally retarded! She plays out in the yard like all the other kids." At the end of the meeting the parents slam the door closed and then the mother pokes her head back in the room and says, "It's all his fault you know. If I knew he couldn't read when I met him at Wal-Mart I never would've married him!"
So, the moral of this story is, if you are looking for someone to marry then you can probably find them in Wal-Mart. Be sure after you meet your future spouse in Wal-Mart that they can actually read. If you are not looking to meet your spouse in Wal-Mart, you should go there just to see who has actually probably met in Wal-Mart and then gotten married.
Busy, busy, busy. Today I was in Target killing time in Birmingham before heading to my free wifi spot to get a little studying done. While I was shopping around for shampoo and whatnot I couldn't help but notice how much STUFF there was for sale. STUFF. I mean, what's it all for anyway? Traveling has made me realize that I can survive so much more simply without all of the stuff. I think back to my house and how much stuff I own that I don't use or need and probably don't even know I have. It's so pointless. Granted, some of the stuff I love and I need or maybe just enjoy, but really? Is it all necessary? I don't think so.
This brings me to another point, busy-ness. In our country we are so blessed and we have everything in large quantities. Our culture as a whole revolves around work. We work and work and work so we can afford all of our stuff. Stuff we don't need. We work and we get tired and we are stressed out trying to earn more and more. When I was in Italy I thought it was neat how their culture took a different perspective on things. They really took time to enjoy life. Most people went to work around 9:00, they shut down their businesses at around 2:00 for a couple of hours to eat and take a nap, and then reopened till evening. Then, half of the businesses totally shut down for like a month at the time for vacationing. Yeah, they just shut down their store completely and put up a sign that said "will re-open at the end of July" or whatever. Shocking, I know. I wish our culture was a little more like theirs in that way. You know, taking time to enjoy life instead of just going, going, going all of the time! I think we, our culture as a whole, would be a lot healthier and happier if our lives were just simplified.
This summer is passing entirely too quickly. So far I have had a blast just traveling here and there and functioning as a person who just flies by the seat of their pants. That's not how I'm used to being because I'm a serious planner, but it is impossible to have a routine day when you have no job and no school. So, I've learned to adapt to this new and excited way of life that involves doing whatever I want when I feel like doing it.
So, in closing I'm going to list several of my favorite songs that I never get tired of.
Here they are in random order:
1. Sweet Baby James by James Taylor
2. Don't Stop Believin by Journey
3. Black Balloon by Googoo Dolls
4. Yellow by Cold Play
5. When You Say Nothing At All by Allison Krauss
6. Best I Ever Had by Verticle Horizon
7. Caried Away by George Strait
8. Better Together by Jack Johnson
9. Offering by Third Day
10. Boom I Got Your Boyfriend (the clean version)
11. It's Your Love by Faith Hill and Tim McGraw
12. Fishing in the Dark by Nitty Gritty Dirt Band
13. I Am by Nicole Nordeman
14. If You Don't by Jimmy Eat World
15. Remember Me by Mark Shultz
16. How to Save a Life by The Fray
17. Up! by Shania
18. A Lifetime by Better Than Ezra
19. Love is On a Roll by Don Williams
20. When You Love Someone by Brian Adams
21. Songs by Casting Crowns (can't pick a favorite)
I have heard it said that you know that you are a threat to Satan when you are being tempted. If you aren't a threat to him then he just leaves you alone. I believe it is wise to acknowledge all the ways that you are tempted so you can be more prepared to face that temptation when it comes. Today I was reminded that temptation isn't the only way that Satan can hinder a Christian in their relationship with God. I believe that he also uses complacency. I believe he lets us feel satisfied in where we are in our spiritual walk and therefore we become stagnant. I don't want to get entirely too personal with this whole blog thing, but I can see how that has happened my life lately. My days get filled up with random this and that and before I know it, I haven't opened my Bible in a week and haven't given it a second thought. I find myself doing just enough to get by, continuing prayer life as normal, but then I realize I haven't really learned anything new because I haven't been spending time with God so He could teach me. So, all this to say, be aware of complacency and stagnation.
And on to an uplifting thought from Ephesians, my favorite book in the Bible....
Chapter 3 verse 20
"God can do anything, you know - far more than you could ever imagine or guess or request in your wildest dreams! He does it not by pushing us around but by working within us, his Spirit deeply and gently within us." ~ The Message
I think that sometimes we (atleast I do) forget Who we are working with here. God.
The Powerful and Almighty Creator. He can do anything. ANYTHING!! Why do I limit him so?
Why is it that fundamentals of Christianity are so hard for me to get sometimes? I was raised going to church and reading the Bible and after 23 years I should have a pretty good idea of what Christianity is all about. It's funny to me the way things hit me out of nowhere that I think I should've gotten all along.
For years and years my thoughts about being a Christian were that I should be set apart from the world, apart from sin, apart from all of the evil things that are taking place. I spend most of my time with my Christian friends, hanging out with them, eating with them, living with them, and going to my church and my Bible studies and everything that is safe. I have come to realize however, that while it is ultimately true that Christians are set apart from the world, we are also put in the world. In Matthew chapter 10 Jesus is sending his disciples out to go to the "lost sheep." He tells them, "I am sending you out as sheep among wolves, therefore be as shrewd as snakes and as innocent as doves." Matt 10:16
As Christians we are not called to spend time in our comfort zones where we feel safe. This is not where we are needed. We are needed by the lost. The people who are in sin, in the gutter. These are the people who aren't just going to stumble into church where all the Christians are spending their time being holy and apart from everything associated with sin. We have to go into these gutters and show them the way out, the way we got out. We can do it too because, "God did not give us a spirit of timidity, but a spirit of power, of love, and of self discipline." 1 Tim 1:7
I came to this realization when I read the book, "The Gutter" by Craig Gross. He has a ministry for those involved in the porn industry. He isn't standing outside the porn conventions telling everyone that they are going to hell. Instead, he is setting up his own booth at the convention and forming relationships with the people there.
I always thought you could help people know God by just being an example of what a Christian should be. Yeah, being an example is great and wonderful. But people don't just need examples, they need relationships.
I could go on and on about this, but I think you should just read the book. It makes a lot of sense and I don't know why I didn't realize this before......
"I can feel your presence here with me. Suddenly I'm lost within your beauty. Caught up in the wonder of your touch. Here in this moment I surrender to your love."
-Mercy Me
"You spoke and made the sunrise, to light up the very first day. You breathed across the water, and started the very first wave....It was you. You make all things new. You redeem and You transform, You renew and You restore, You make all thinks new and forever we will watch and worship you."
-Stephen Curtis Chapman
Those two quotes pretty much sum up all that I have experienced in the past month. I was laying on a beach in St. Thomas, surrounded with the beauty of God's creation when I stumbled across those two songs on my ipod. I couldn't believe how much they applied to my life at that moment.
In the past month I have gotten to experience quality time with good friends, spending time in God's amazing creation, visiting our country's capital, making new friends, getting reaquainted with old friends, spending time with my family, and just being myself and enjoying life. Coming up on the agenda: more fun things!
In a week I get to go back to the beach with my family and then go up to Impact in Nashville for three days to take care of Cameron, Carson, and Cambridge, my youth minister's children. I am looking forward to this because I get to experience Impact and spend time with their family before they move away to Australia. Then, with July comes more time with friends (hopefully some will come visit me) and my mission trip to New York City!! I am going to chaperone the youth group trip to Camp Shiloh, a christian camp for the inner city children of the Bronx. It is awesome and I am so so excited that I get to go! With August comes the nausiating, sickening feeling and dread of starting back to school. We won't think about that now.
God bless the summer and God has truly blessed me this summer. I am very very thankful!
Most people I talk to: "So Katie, what are you doing this summer?"
Me: "I'm just hanging out."
Them: "Are you working?"
Me: "No."
Them: "Are you taking classes?"
Me: "No."
Them: "You suck." or "That'll be a nice break for you." or, my personal favorite,
"You are going to get so bored!"
BORED?!!!!! BORED?!!!!!
The more I have thought about this response the more it bothers me. It seems as though people have become conditioned to think that school and work are the only things in this life to keep you occupied. Some seem to have lost touch with the fact that we go to school to get a job to fund our life. We do not work because work is life.
I hope that this is something that I never forget. It must be an easy thing to forget because so many people seem to think that without work or school to keep one busy, there is nothing else to do.
How can this be so? There is so much about this life to enjoy. There are so many amazing things and places in this world to learn about and experience. There are friends and family to talk to and spend time with. There are games and books and activities....there is so much to be learned! The more I learn, the more I realize that I don't know. I know probably .1% of all the things there are to know about, if that. That's crazy considering that I'm about to start my sixth year of college and I am in my 24th year of life.
Then there is God and all things spiritual. Can you ever learn enough, study enough , worship or experience enough when it comes to God?
Bored. Ha.
p.s. If anyone reads this and then hears me say that I am bored, please slap me in the face.
I am completely stunned. I was doing a little bedtime reading and decided I'd skim through my last three unread issues of Marie Claire to see if they might contain something interesting. I hit the jackpot with the May issue. I was stunned when I read the lead in from this article. Here is an exerpt:
"In a workaholic Japan, career-driven women can find themselves, at age 30, lacking in sexual experience. Embarrassed to admit their perceived shortcomings to boyfriends, they grapple with a dilemma: Where do good girls go to learn about lovemakling? Enter the volunteer sex corps, a secret group of men who deflower women."
Needless to say, this article caught my attention so I read on. Turns out, there is an actual organization where men "volunteer" to have sex with these initial virgins free of charge. According to the article, "The volunteers are necessary because Japan is a chauvinistic society. Men have mistresses or the huge sex industry to cater to their needs, but there are few outlets for single women, or unfulfilled married women, to address their sexual wants." Here's another kicker, the "volunteers" are often married and have children. The article also states that in Japan, you're not a real woman if you are still a virgin. "In the past, virginity was prized, but now, men prefer their girlfriends to know what they are doing in bed."
Seriously?!!! What is the world coming to?
Hebrews 13:4
"Marriage should be honored by all, and the marriage bed kept pure, for God will judge the adulterer and the sexually immoral."
I am not trying to be all preachy with this entry by any means. I understand that people mess up all the time and that no one is perfect. That is why we need Jesus. But what I don't understand is how people can have such disregard for the Truth. Perhaps they don't know it. Maybe they need someone to show them what the truth is. Maybe if they new about God, and about our Savior then they wouldn't be looking for solutions to their marriage problems at a sex corps. Maybe then women wouldn't feel inadequate for being virgins. Is anyone sharing with these people the good news? Is anyone telling them that they can find a longterm solution to their problem and not just a temporary fix? I hope so. I pray so.
"He said to them, 'Go into all the world and preach the good news to all creation. Whoever believes and is baptized will be saved, but whoever does not will be condemned." Matthew 16:15-16
